This work has only been published on Patreon.
This work may not be canon.
“Can’t Stab Everything” is a short story published on Patreon in 2020. Alex and his friends react to the covid-19 pandemic in February and March 2020.
Warning[]
“Can’t Stab Everything” contains explicit expletives, polyamory, lust, pop culture references, fantasy depictions of the occult and witchcraft, and portrayals of divine and demonic matters bearing little or no resemblance to religious canon.
Synopsis[]
A series of slice-of-life vignettes, as Alex and friends learned about and discussed the Coronavirus, early lockdown, and how they could act. Topics included toilet paper, University lockdown, the status of the pool hall, curing diseases with magic, the government response, and what Heaven can and cannot do.
Appearances[]
Roughly in order of appearance.
Characters[]
- Alex Carlisle
- Lorelei
- Jason Cohen
- Taylor
- Drew Jones
- Wade Reinhardt
- Molly Murray
- Onyx
- Amber Maddox
- Rachel
- Ahmed Kovac (mentioned only)
Locations & organizations[]
- Seattle
- Suite 1705
- University of Washington
- Ahmed Kovac’s pool hall (mentioned only)
- House 12573
- Special Task Force
Publication history[]
“Can’t Stab Everything” was first published on Elliott Kay’s Patreon in July 2020.
Theories[]
Since the story is explicitly set in 2020, it is semi-canonical. For our purposes, this means the specific events didn’t happen, but that everything said about the characters, their relationships, and magic is correct: Drew is heavily involved in the pool hall; Molly’s and Onyx’s statements about healing and diseases are true; their relation with the FBI is tenuous but works on personal trust, and so on.